I come from a confused generation
though I was raised to be married
in a white gown, catholic church
virgin, with a diamond ring

preferably to a man with good intentions
(scratch that, great intentions)
who’d provide me a comfortable life

while I cook, clean, iron
bear children and get fat

but I stopped being raised at 12

and at the age of 14
I discovered my generation

revolution. rebellion. raves.
booty shaking, vodka sipping
cigarette smoking, sex.

the woodstock of my time

new age revolution lead by the mindless
seeking more mindlessness in dance clubs
spreading midnight alcoholic sprees

I digged the alluring scene…

then came the prince on a white stallion
to rescue me from the dark side

but I was no longer marriage material

though one of the greatest perks of the
catholic church is we can repent
(or at least pretend)
and all is ok

so I married in a white gown, at a church
un-virgin, with a diamond ring
to a man who gave me a comfortable life

but who is to blame for acid trips
ecstasy rolls and self revelations,
freeing the mind from its prison

seeking I found a hole, a gap in my heart

so I sought Ra – god of my expansion
in early morning pleas
with breathing techniques

I ordered a birth chart
checked my horoscope daily
and started to read books by Osho

I found my long lost friends;
yoga, meditation and wine

I cried often, drank often
cooked, cleaned and ironed
dedicated my life to poetry
and began to forget all about love

but there was a yearning for more, more

it was Ptah who came to my rescue

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